Tag: journal

About Me

Life

Autumn

Went to a neighbor’s birthday party yesterday, and I’m still feeling drained. So. Many. People. The children loved it though, so it was worth it.

Also, according to the neighborhood news, some creep was driving around trying to talk kids into getting in his car, so fun stuff going on. I know some people called the police about it, but I didn’t catch what happened after that.

Millennial parents get a ton of crap about being “over protective” ‘n stuff, but I’d much rather sit outside supervising my children playing in the yard, then end up being that parent, you know? An ounce of prevention…

Today my husband and I took the kids out on a mile long bike ride, and afterwards we ate mint chocolate chip ice cream with sugar cones. Then I roasted coffee beans on the porch and yelled at the kids to stop putting mud in their splash pad. Good times.

I started crocheting a stuffed dragon. In terms of technique, I find it boring to only work one stitch over and over and over, but those toys are so stinking cute.

I’m nearly finished sewing some pants that I designed for myself. They have wide legs with an asymmetrical hemline that drape beautifully, and I’ll probably have them finished tomorrow. *So excited*

And that’s why I’ll never be normal, lol.

About Writing

Navigating Fantasy and Sci-Fi: Finding Your Unique Niche

Autumn

I actually have a hard time knowing how to classify my writing. Oh sure, there’s the big picture ‘fantasy/sci fi’ tag, but I get a little lost in the subgenres.

For example, my concept story “THEM” is my idea for a time traveling romance. Only, it features a nebulous alien invasion versus sorcerers, and the main love interest travels back in time to coach the main character (who was brought forward in time after her original was killed by the aliens) on how to seduce his contemporary counterpart, except she’s a reluctant introvert with social anxiety. All while she’s nannying a 4-year-old prince. Cue gothic overtones.

Maybe I’m just not well read enough, but I haven’t seen any hints of other books that are remotely like that.

Am I my own niche?

Which is one of the reasons why it’s so easy for me to put off that whole “marketing” thing (not to mention, I don’t want to mentally drain myself so I can’t spend time writing every day, ’cause it’s the writing part that I love the most).

I also have a malfunction.

But sometimes I feel lost in the noise. There are a lot of danged writers these days, and sometimes I think it’s harder to convince people to read something for free than it is to get them to buy it. Like, da hek ppl?

Am I going to find more readers by demanding money? Is that what you want out of me?

Anyway

My husband thinks I’m better at writing sci fi than fantasy. It is true that I was exposed to fantasy first, and there is a possibility that I might have stuck with it out of habit, despite the fact that I don’t actually like “sword and sorcery” type stuff all that much; hence why my Order of the Magi all use the internet and conduct their business with electronic tablets. I also prefer to explore human nature, instead of ‘world building’ or any of the typical fantasy tropes, but I also don’t like Star Trek type stories, or “technology is the magic” sorts of things either. I guess that I’ve got a nerdy enough bent to me that I like a solid foundation in reality. I’ve probably just illustrated that I’m actually a very picky reader.

So … the sequel to The Black Magus will very likely have a more sci fi atmosphere instead of fantasy. Heck, I established that magic is mostly just learning how to muck around with reality’s programming code anyway.

The hilarious part is, I have zero intuitive understanding of today’s trendy technology. Smart devices and I don’t get along. At all.

About Me

Time Management

Autumn

I often think to myself that I ought to treat writing more like a part-time job than a hobby, and make some adjustments to our routine so I can write in the mornings when my mind is sharper. The benefit is that I’ll be able to work much faster than I currently do.

I’ve given myself the goal of publishing a new novel every year, which is a perfectly respectable pace all told, and in that regard I think that I’m doing just fine. But I’m also interested in exploring creative writing in different formats, and that’s going to take up more time. A lot more.

Which means that I need to manage my time more efficiently.

Which is a bit of a trick with a 10-month-old crawling all over me. >.<

So, in addition to writing novels, I’ve decided that I want to turn The Scion Suit into a text-based game.
i dunno why im such a nerd.
That means writing a multi-pronged script, and learning basic programming (which has my husband tickled). You’d think that I have enough going on, but writing the script for a video game is one of my bucket-list items, and there’s no time like the present.
We’re probably not going to be spending every weekend at the pool this summer anyway.

Besides, as long as I stick to the adage that “Progress is progress,” even just an hour a week will eventually add up. I’m pretty certain I do everything in 10-20 minute increments.

So I plan on starting off with a “choose your own adventure” format, but I want to get stats worked in as well.

I’m also looking forward to when the New Pokemon Snap comes out at the end of the month, so I’m probably going to have to quit watching movies and youtube. Frank James will just have to continue on without me. XD

About Me

Piano

Autumn

I’ve been practicing the piano every day since we got one last October.

I’m totally hooked.

Heck, I was even tempted to write about Alice learning how to play in AatW, but I couldn’t get it to properly fit — that’s how much I’m loving it.

When I was a kid, I got through level three before quitting lessons, so I’ve been getting myself back up to speed over the past few months. Several days ago, I started practicing level 4 songs (oh ho ho!). They’ve also been getting stuck in my head pretty badly, so playing piano is becoming almost as compulsory as writing.

I’m doing this “mom style,” of course, with either a baby in the carrier, or a toddler on my lap — though occasionally I get to be free to focus on what I’m doing.

I’ve given myself the goal of being able to play every song in the lesson books that I’m following, but since I’m teaching myself, I’m definitely spending a lot more time on the songs I like while giving a cursory nod to those I don’t. I’m also skipping around a fair bit; that’s how I do things.

Photo by Elina Sazonova on Pexels.com
About Me

Scones

Autumn

I grew up in Utah, so to me, scones were something that you fried in oil and ate with honey butter. It wasn’t until I was an adult that I learned that scones were something completely different to the rest of the world.

For those who are curious about this “Utah scone” idea, you take some sort of white bread dough (I personally like to use a dinner roll recipe), shape it flat after letting it rise, then fry it in oil until golden (flipping them over to cook both sides). The bigger the better. Like, if you can make them as big as a dinner plate, you’ve mastered the art of Utah scones. Eat with lots of honey butter — and I mean lots. We’re talking sinful levels of indulgence here.

Anyway

The other day it hit me that I can’t remember ever eating a *real* scone. So I pulled out my big book of baking recipes, and found one for chocolate chip orange scones. Basically, any recipe that calls for citrus zest is a winner in my mind, so I went for it.

Not my recipe, so I’m not going to post it. 😛

Just imagine a basic scone with orange zest, orange juice, and chocolate chips added. Then sprinkle with cinnamon sugar before baking. In fact, you can take this recipe, and substitute the last three ingredients for everything I just mentioned, plus 1/3 cup milk.

I just dropped the dough down on the cookie sheet without doing any sort of shaping, ’cause I’m lazy like that. Consequently, my kids are pretty convinced that these are cookies, and nothing is going to change their minds.

And wow, these are so good.

About Me

Sanity

Autumn

Writing keeps me sane.

My usual tradition is to read a book after finishing a first draft, before beginning on the second. This time, circumstances aren’t quite usual.

In one sense, I’m barely aware of the world. Truth is, ten years ago I saw too much, and turned my back on society in disgust. I don’t like being a negative person, but there’s really no other way for me to describe why I live like a hermit in the middle of suburbia. Heck, we even tried going off grid several years ago, but that proved to be too difficult with the resources we had.

And yet, there’s a great deal that even I can’t hide from. I feel it every time I see a face mask littering the sidewalk. I know it’s out there, lurking just outside our fence line.

It’s seemingly taken away my ability to focus on reading. I can do everything else, but whenever I sit down with a book, I can’t follow what’s happening on the pages or remember who’s who. I can only finish short novellas if I read them out loud to my children (We’re currently reading The Fairy Rebel). I end up doing some sort of fiddly craft with my hands instead.

I can’t follow my usual ritual this time around. When I don’t spend my evenings re-centering my balance and exploring my fictional world, the noise from the children during the day gets inside my head too much.

So it looks like I’ll be plowing through the second draft of Alice and the Warden without “cleansing my mental palate” first. I have to work with what I’ve got.

About Me

Deep Fried

Autumn

I burnt out on movies, so I switched over to watching Youtube whenever I needed to mindlessly veg for a bit.

So, the other day I was watching a food channel, and the person said something along the lines of, “Fried foods absorb oil, and that’s bad for you.”

Something inside of me snapped.

Like, “Fuck it. I’m buying a deep fryer.”

Gonna eat beignets for breakfast every single day.

Actually, I’m way too stingy to buy a deep fryer when I have a perfectly good pot and a stove, but the sentiment still stands. People have been frying foods in oil for literally ages, so I think it’s okay for me to eat something without you getting all up in my business. There’s too much of that going around.

Deal with it.

Photo by Polina Tankilevitch on Pexels.com
About Me

Kittens

Autumn

We kinda didn’t get around to spaying our cat over the last few months.

But look

Babies!

24 hours old.

My life is proof that women CAN have it all; I am both a wife/mother, AND a crazy cat lady.

XD

#OMGtoomanycats

About Me

Introversion

Autumn

I’m very introverted, and sometimes the ability to socialize just isn’t there. Not only am I unable to think of anything to say, I don’t have the energy to listen/read what anyone else has to say either, and I don’t even want to deal with anyone online or through texts. My husband occasionally teases me that if I were any more introverted, I’d be nonfunctional in society.

When I first became a mother, I worried about how I was going to raise and homeschool my children without going crazy. Being an introvert, my social circle is very small. I am also the black sheep of my extended family, so they’ve been a non-factor in my life (which is my polite way of saying I have zero contact with most of my relatives). Babysitting is not easy to come by, especially because I’m extremely distrustful of leaving my children with people I don’t know very well.

It took some time, but I found my zen.

Which wound up leaving me well positioned for the lockdowns.

While others are sobbing for a break from their children, I already have the routine and boundaries in place for me to thrive. Bonus: As an introvert, I don’t require much interaction with others.

What I had initially feared would be a weakness, turned out to be a strength.

Obviously, what works for me probably isn’t going to work for most other people, because my form of recharging involves going inside my own head (usually to explore story ideas), but my advice is:

…

Honestly, I don’t enjoy giving advice; I couldn’t care less what you do. It’s mostly that I’ve seen some people having nervous breakdowns, and thought to myself, “Phew, glad I’m not like that.” I want to share my personal thoughts more, but I worry too much about hurting other people’s feelings. I’m not trying to rub it in.

But seriously, I really don’t care what you do or don’t do. It’s your life, and if you want to have a nervous breakdown and wallow in depression, go right ahead. All power to you.

About Me

2021

Autumn

I’m going to be completely honest and tell you: I fully expect 2021 to be even worse.

You’re welcome.

Here’s the thing: Life isn’t a linear board game. The point isn’t to race to the end while accumulating the most money, and there aren’t any winners in the end.

Poets of the Fall is my favorite band, and the above quote comes from their song, “Love Will Come to You”. The lyrics continue on to say,

Life doesn’t run a clear course
It flows through from within
It’s supposed to take you places and leave markings on your skin

And those marks are just a sign of something true
you witnessed in your time
Of something new, like the start of something fine

Poets of the Fall, Love will Come to You

Life is an adventure. Life is a testament to the strength of the human spirit. Sometimes we are meant to survive the black plague, or huddle in shelters as the cities around us burn, or scrounge for meager scraps of food in the face of starvation. The fact is, life never has been, and never will be, a set course to follow. It requires far too much adaptation and perseverance.

Our ancestors were strong AF, and they passed that strength on to us. If you’re worried about your ability to make it through tough times, remember that the gift of strength was already given to you through countless generations that survived hardships we can’t imagine. This is our adventure and our legacy – our moment in history. Embrace it, and pass the gift of strength on to the future.

So yes, I do fully believe that 2021 will be much harder, but I also fully believe that it’s our time to show the Universe what we’re made of.