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Fade to White chapter 11
I liked drawing a lot back when I was a dorky teenager, but never considered myself to be a proper artist (I prioritized writing too much). Mostly for fun, I decided to illustrate a cover for my current posting of Fade to White.
Fade to White
Chapter Eleven
That morning Tryne had made the suggestion, and half an hour later they were riding Jerek’s horse through the forest on their way to the Amber Village. Before leaving, Jerek had tied back his hair and pressed his hat over his head, though he had become confident that no one could identify him. He was happy that they were finally leaving the farm, since the number of chores that Tryne had set for him had become irritating.
“This is nice,” Tryne murmured, resting her cheek against Jerek’s back and closing her eyes. “I never realized how much work my mom was doing just to keep that farm running.”
“You can always move somewhere else,” Jerek suggested once again.
“No, I’ll just scale back next year.” Tryne laughed. “Besides, where would I go?”
“Anywhere. Somewhere far away from here.”
“Jerek, are you suggesting that I run away with you?” Jerek didn’t answer so Tryne continued, “I’ll admit it’s tempting, but I like what we have now. We don’t need to go anywhere.”
“You’re way too stubborn.” Dismounting his horse, Jerek helped Tryne get down. “I want to . . .” he trailed off, searching for the words he wanted to say. “Buy you something . . .”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know, something.”
Tryne smiled, putting her hand in Jerek’s. “I know where we should go.”
Taking his horse’s reigns, Jerek let Tryne lead him through the town. “We can get dinner too, I have the money.” He had helped himself to Nosaj’s funds whenever he had felt like it, and thus had accumulated quite a bit of money over the years.
“How much mercenary work do you do?”
“Enough.” She was asking too many questions again and Jerek needed to think of a way to get her off that topic. “So what do you want to get?”
“This, here.” Tryne pointed to a shop that was in front of them. “It sells dresses, I hope you don’t mind.”
Jerek stopped, seeing the women come and leave out the front door. He didn’t want to go in there, not with all those females crowding around, and a sort of deep resentment rose up in him as he watched those women, wondering how many of them were whores. Reaching into his pocket, Jerek pulled out a coin bag and put it into Tryne’s hand. “I’ll wait out here,” he said stiffly.
Tryne paused before saying, “Okay, I’ll be fast.” She gave him a light, somewhat awkward hug, before turning around and heading into the shop.
Jerek looked around, wondering what he was going to do now. This wasn’t what he had imagined happening, and yet he didn’t even know what it was that he had imagined. A little way down the street was a tavern, so Jerek set off to it. Stepping in and sitting down, he ordered a sarsparilla to drink, having always been wary of anything alcoholic and preferring to stay sober. Without even thinking, he reached for a cigaret, then remembered that he had left them back at Nosaj’s castle. Minutes seemed to stretch themselves out, and by the time Jerek finished his first drink he was thoroughly bored. He felt tempted to go and find Tryne, despite what other sort of trash might be there. At least then something would be happening.
Almost starting to laugh, Jerek raised his second sarsparilla to his lips. He really liked Tryne, to the point where he would withstand being surrounded by women just to be with her. That made him pathetic and he didn’t even mind. For once he didn’t care about looking stupid; he didn’t care about always appearing to be the big bad guy, since none of that mattered to the person he wanted to impress the most. It was Tryne’s fault for turning him that way, yet that only made him like her more. There really had to be something wrong with him.
“It’s those damn terrorists!” a man suddenly yelled, pounding his fist against the table and rattling the bottles on it.
Jerek jumped at the noise, but now that his attention had been drawn to the two men sitting close to him, he found himself listening to their conversation with interest.
“If they would stop rebelling and agitating the Commander, then the rest of us would be able to live in peace!”
The man’s companion murmured something inaudible, but the man responded with, “I mean that Opal would have never been destroyed if it wasn’t for them. I tell you, they are the ones who should be considered bad, not the Commander. What has the Commander and King ever done to us?”
“He didn’t have to resort to violence so quickly,” the second man replied, his voice growing louder. “He could have taken care of the terrorists without killing everyone in the village.”
“They deserved what they got, for letting the terrorists take over like that. If I knew that there were members of that group here in Amber, I’d hunt them down myself.”
“I heard a rumor that a woman had been picked up in this village for claiming to be a member of the group, so they’re definitely in this village too.”
“That’s what I heard too, and that’s why I’ve decided to personally start keeping my eyes open for more of them. If I see anyone acting suspicious, I’ll get a group together to lynch them.”
Jerek slowly took a sip of his drink. Listening to Tryne talk about the same event made it seem like it was a black and white situation, with everyone clearly against Nosaj’s tyranny, but apparently the villagers themselves had mixed feelings about the rebel group. Jerek wondered what Tryne was doing at that moment.
The tavern door bashed open and a man stood hunched over, trying to catch his breath as he gasped out, “Nosaj – troops – attacking!”
Jerek was the first one to push past the man and run outside, immediately turning to the shop Tryne was in. Reaching for his sword yet feeling nothing, he realized that he had left it back at the cottage, carefully stashed under his bed. Armored men were scattered around the village, rounding up everyone they were able to hold at weapon point, holding them in the center of the town. Jerek kept his head down, fearing that if he was recognized it would be the end of everything.
It seemed to take him forever to get to the shop and barge his way inside. He almost ran into one of Nosaj’s soldiers, surprising both of them for a moment. The soldier relaxed, starting to salute when Jerek clubbed him on the side of his head, knocking him over. Jerek cursed, looking at the stinging cut on his hand, wishing he hadn’t hit the soldier’s helmet. Reaching down he lifted the man up and clamped one hand around the soldier’s neck, causing the soldier’s mouth to gape open and closed, his eyes bulging out of his head. “You . . . !” he gasped. Placing his other hand on the top of the man’s head, Jerek gave it a sharp twist, snapping the man’s neck.
From somewhere in the back of the shop, he heard a scream pierce through the noise and chaos that surrounded him. Tryne. Quickly retrieving the sword from the dead soldier, Jerek bounded to where the scream came from. Tryne was pinned against the back wall by another one of Nosaj’s soldiers, whose helmet was lying by his feet. Long dark scratches ran across the soldier’s face and the fingertips of Tryne’s hand were also bloody. She screamed again, angrily trying to break free but the man kept her held against the wall by her wrists. Red flashed in Jerek’s eyes and like a deadly serpent he came up silently from behind, using his sword to bite into the man’s neck and nearly sever his head completely.
Shocked, Tryne watched the soldier’s corpse fall to the ground, then looked at Jerek. “I . . .” she started to say, but her face, and even her lips, turned a sickly white, so she put her hand up to her mouth, bending over as she retched.
“Come on.” Jerek grabbed Tryne’s wrist, pulling her after him. They needed somewhere to hide; there was no possible way he could fight against his own men. He needed his horse that was still tied up outside the tavern, bucking and neighing fiercely. It was a chance he had to take.
Dragging Tryne, Jerek bolted to his horse, grabbing the reigns and looking around for somewhere to go. Between two buildings he caught a glimpse of the side of a mausoleum next to a few tombstones, and he made the decision to go there. The world around him seemed to blur together as he made his way to his goal, and sound faded into the distance as they entered the graveyard, causing Jerek’s stomach to churn. Although he knew that this was the safest possible place, he couldn’t help the superstitious thoughts that crossed his mind; but it was because of those superstitions that none of Nosaj’s troops would dare to step foot in the graveyard. Simply being there wasn’t enough however, as it was still possible that he could be seen and recognized. Feeling even more wary and hesitant, Jerek led Tryne to the mausoleum in the center of the cemetery, stopping briefly to tie his horse to a tree. When they reached the building, Tryne was the one who stepped forward to push the door open, causing it to groan and creak loudly.
“Is this good enough?” she asked, peering into the dark.
“It should be. Leave the door open.”
Holding hands tightly, they stepped inside at the same time. Thick dust covered the rows of coffins lined up against the walls on both sides, lining the path of stone down the middle. At the other end there was an empty corner, waiting for a wooden box to fill it.
Tryne grabbed Jerek’s arm. “What if what they say about these places is true?”
“I don’t want to think about that.” Taking a deep breath, Jerek closed his eyes then took a step forward. Nothing happened. Slowly he took another step, then another. Still nothing happened. With Tryne clinging tightly to his arm, he walked down the center aisle, all the while searching for something that seemed threatening. When they reached the empty corner, he couldn’t help but let out a deep sigh of relief. There was nothing to worry about.
He sat down in the corner, wrapping his arms around Tryne and holding her tightly. It was pitch black behind the coffins, and Jerek’s eyes searched to break through the darkness but he couldn’t find any light. All he could feel was Tryne’s warm body against his, her lungs expand and contract as she breathed, the slight tremor that ran through her. His heart beat fiercely, overjoyed that she took up all of his senses, that she was all that existed in this place of death.
“Jerek,” Tryne whispered. “Tell me if you see any ghosts.”
“I don’t think there are any.”
They spent the rest of the time settled in silence, Jerek dozing off so he couldn’t tell how many minutes or hours had passed. Tryne had fallen asleep, breathing slowly with her head against his chest. Absentmindedly, Jerek stroked her hair, keeping hold of her as if he was afraid that letting go of her would cause her to slip away into the darkness. His eyelids drooped again, this time staying closed.
Tryne stirred and sat up, her movement pulling Jerek out of his sleep. Standing, Jerek stretched his stiff muscles while Tryne yawned and laid back down on the floor. Light still shone outside of the open doorway.
“Do you suppose we can leave now?” Tryne asked hazily.
Jerek paused before answering, “No. We’ll wait longer.”
“Why?”
“Because they could still be out there. I don’t want to find out that they are and end up . . .”
Tryne pushed herself to her feet, and looked into Jerek’s eyes. “You’re worried about me getting hurt.”
“I wouldn’t be doing my job very well if you did. You hired me to be your protector.”
“I’m not paying you any money.”
Jerek matched Tryne’s gaze, both of them staring at each other intently. This was one thing that Jerek was determined to not concede on, no matter what. She was never going to get him to admit to anything. “Then I don’t care.”
“All right then, I’m going.” Tryne took a step, but Jerek grabbed her arms.
“No! You will listen to me and obey me. You are not going out until I say so!”
Tryne reached up and brushed away strands of hair that had fallen in Jerek’s face. “If you’re that concerned about it then I guess I will stay here with you, but on one condition.” Jerek raised an eyebrow. “I slept in a weird position and now my muscles are sore.”
Sitting down, Tryne bent over with Jerek behind her. Unsure of himself, Jerek put his hands on Tryne’s shoulders and began moving them around in what he hoped was a massage.
“I suppose a graveyard is just too dark and creepy,” Tryne mused.
“For what?”
“I mean, it’d be more appropriate for a ghost or a skeleton to jump out at us, or a . . .” Tryne suddenly shrieked, jumping up and beating at her skirt with her hands.
“What is it?” Alarmed, Jerek stood as well.
“Spider!” Tryne yelped. “I felt it on me!”
Standing for a second in silence, Jerek burst out laughing. Pulling Tryne into a hug, he whispered mockingly, “There, there, I won’t let the spiders get you.”
Tryne hit him with all of her strength.
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Fade to White Chapter 10
Fade to White
Chapter Ten
There was simply nothing left to do, and only one thing that Jerek wanted to do. Besides, if he was going to go, then it was best that he do it quickly to avoid running into Nosaj or Ramo again. Deep in his heart, Jerek didn’t really want to oversee the relocation for Nosaj, and by leaving he wouldn’t have to.
With that plan set in his mind, Jerek pulled out a travel bag and he began stuffing his shirts and pants into it, then he slung the bag across his back. Jerek retrieved his sword from where it stood propped up in the corner by his bedroom door, and strung it through his belt, giving him all of the essentials that he needed to go.
Ordinarily Jerek left the castle whenever he wished, but also ordinarily he didn’t have his clothes packed up with a recent history of a long disappearance. It was possible that he could raise a few inquiries because of those two combined facts, so he decided to sneak out. Slinking around the corridors, Jerek found a certain delight in avoiding being seen as the adrenalin pumped through his veins. However, as usual there were very few people wandering around the halls and his thrill was short lived as he found himself outside very quickly. Not even the stable keeper was around to fuss over Jerek saddling his horse and galloping off into the surrounding forest.
Jerek couldn’t keep from chuckling, wondering what Ramo would think if he knew what he was doing. Ramo would certainly be surprised, but Jerek justified his actions because he missed her; the woman who had invaded his thoughts and feelings, who agitated somewhere in the back of his mind a vague memory of something that used to be pure. There was an exception to the rule of women, and Jerek had found that exception.
When Jerek arrived in the clearing, he saw Tryne sitting in her open doorway with her head turned the other way. For some reason, that made him nervous. The constant thudding of the horse’s hooves echoed the pounding in his chest. He wanted her to look over and see him, to notice him before he had to announce his presence, but her head stayed turned the other way, refusing to show him anything other than the back of her orange hair. Five feet away, he dismounted, his feet making noise as they hit the ground and flattened the grass underneath him, his sword also clinking in its sheath. Now she had to be ignoring him, because it was obvious that he was there. Irritated, Jerek strode right up behind Tryne and stopped with his feet apart and arms folded.
“You didn’t say anything when you left,” she said, still refusing to look at him. Slowly she stood up, then in one swift movement turned around and punched Jerek in the shoulder.
He stumbled back a step. “What was that for?”
“I thought that you’d never come back. I thought for sure that . . .”
“You’re crazy!” Jerek rotated his shoulder, almost ashamed that it hurt.
“You deserved that, but I guess that since you did come back I might as well help you.” Tryne reached toward Jerek, but he flinched away. “Oh come on now.” Grabbing Jerek roughly, she turned him around then began massaging his shoulders. It felt surprisingly nice and relaxing. “I’m really glad you came back,” Tryne whispered, stopping and letting her hands rest between his shoulder blades.
Jerek grunted, wanting to say the same but feeling too embarrassed to express any sort of emotion. Instead, he half turned to look at her and with a small grin said, “Don’t worry about it. I was just getting my sword, since I’m your protection after all.”
Tryne’s face lit up with curiosity as she reached for the weapon on Jerek’s belt.
“Hey!” He turned away from her.
“I just want to look at it. I’ve never seen a weapon with a black hilt like that before. It’s got to be high quality, very expensive.”
“Don’t touch my sword,” Jerek said with an almost threatening tone. “Besides, why are you even still here? You should’ve moved to town.”
“I could never leave my farm in the middle of the season. I have to finish this year out so I’m staying right here.” Jerek flinched, remembering what Nosaj had said about the cottage, but Tryne didn’t notice. “Though I admit,” she said as Jerek felt Tryne’s hand slip into his, their fingers interlocking, “it does get lonely.” Feeling excited and unsure of himself, Jerek closed his fingers and gripped her hand, his heart thumping almost painfully as he longed to do something else, but he couldn’t figure out what. It was something that involved her, something that . . . Nosaj flooded his head, repeating the words, “I want that farm destroyed.”
“It’d be easier on you if you left.” Jerek tried to sound casual, not wanting to give away that he knew anything.
“Ken tried to get me to leave too. When we discovered that you were gone, he claimed that Nosaj’s army would be marching down on me at any moment and I would be safer in the town, but now that you’re back I don’t think it matters anymore.”
“I’m only one person,” Jerek said darkly, then caught himself. “I can’t do farmwork, so you’d be working all by yourself. You really should move to the town . . .” No, the town wasn’t any safer. “. . . or somewhere so you don’t have to worry about keeping the farm up.”
“Jerek, what are you getting at? Why are you so insistent on me leaving the farm?” Jerek froze as he heard Tryne say that, fearing that he had given away too much. “Do you hate farmwork that much?”
“Yes.” He couldn’t keep the relief out of his voice.
“Then I won’t make you do any, but I’m not leaving before winter comes. I have a responsibility, after all.”
Jerek almost wanted to growl at her stubbornness. Perhaps Nosaj would wait a few days before he sent his forces without Jerek.
“Would you like to have a picnic? I’ll prepare the food while you move your stuff in and settle down some,” Tryne said.
“It’s all about food with you, isn’t it?”
“If you feed a stray animal enough, it’ll never leave.”
“Are you saying that I’m a stray animal?”
“Think about it. I found you injured one day after you ran into a tree.” Tryne paused and giggled as Jerek winced. “Then I nursed you back to health. Ever since then you’ve been in and out, and I really hope that this time you’re here to stay. By the way.” Tryne reached up and brushed Jerek’s hair aside, gently touching the scab on the side of his head. “How are you feeling?”
“Fine.”
“That’s good, and it doesn’t look infected so I’d dare say you’ll live through this experience.”
“I’m not too sure about that, you might end up smothering me to death.” Jerek grabbed Tryne’s hand, holding it in place. “Same bed?”
“What?” Tryne gave Jerek a strange look.
“Am I in the same bed as the last time? I didn’t mean . . .” Jerek’s face turned red, and he quickly let go of Tryne’s hand.
“Oh, yeah. We should probably get ready for our picnic now, so we can have as much time as we’d like.”
Fifteen minutes later they were sitting in a sunny patch of grass with lunch spread out before them on an old blanket.
“Tell me about yourself,” Tryne said. “I want to know everything about you.”
“Like what?”
“For starters, cats or dogs?”
Jerek thought for a moment. Ramo kept a cat, a fluffy fur ball with a squashed face that gave him a permanently grumpy look. He liked that cat better than the guard dogs that barked and tried to jump on him. The cat, at least, left him alone. “Cats.”
“Me too. How about your favorite color?”
“Why on earth would someone have a favorite color?”
“I don’t know, everyone just has a color that they like better than the others. Don’t you have one?”
Jerek looked around, then his gaze settled on Tryne’s hair. “Reddish-orange gold.”
Tryne giggled and blushed. “You’re just trying to flatter me.” Leaning forward she whispered into Jerek’s ear, “It’s working,” then sat back, continuing their conversation. “My favorite is pale pink. What’s your favorite food?”
“How long do we have to keep doing this?”
“Okay, I get your hint, you don’t have any favorites. What do you do in your spare time?”
“And yet you still keep up with the questions. All I do is sit in my window and smoke!”
“You didn’t have to snap at me like that.” Sulking, Tryne looked at the sky away from Jerek.
In that moment Jerek deeply regretted that he had been rude. He didn’t think that he would hurt her feelings, but he couldn’t take the harshness of his voice back. Instead, he acted on his first impulse. Wrapping his arms around Tryne in an embrace, he pulled her close to him and whispered, “I’m sorry.” Tryne’s eyes opened wide, then slowly closed as she smiled slightly, moving to rest her head against his chest.
“It’s all right,” she murmured. “Let’s just stay like this for a little bit.”
Jerek nodded, moving one of his hands to stroke the back of Tryne’s head. Her hair was soft and smooth to his touch, and it felt good to hold her even though it made his heart beat a little faster. He wanted them to stay like that for a long time, with the warm sun bathing them in a way that made the whole world stand still in peaceful serenity.
However, after awhile Jerek’s muscles started to feel stiff and Tryne was more like a heavy weight pushing against his chest, constricting his breathing. Gently taking Tryne’s shoulders and pushing her away, he shifted and stretched, easing the aches in his back and legs. Tryne stretched a little bit too, raising her arms to the sky and falling backwards onto the grass.
“Jerek,” Tryne said grinning. “You turned me into something sappy. You should be ashamed of yourself.”
“You’ve done far worse to me. You know, there’s someone who would die to be you right now.” Jerek chuckled.
“Really? Who is she?”
“Just someone I grew up with,” Jerek vaguely replied, starting to feel like he had given away to much information.
“I’m feeling a little deflated. I was under the impression that I was your only acquaintance, and now I find out that you’re leading along other girls as well.” Tryne folded her arms and puckered out her lips in exaggerated pouting.
“I don’t lead anyone along. If I don’t like someone, I tell them, and if they still insist on obsessing over me then that’s their problem.”
“Do you like me?”
Jerek was caught off guard by Tryne’s question, even though he should have been able to see it coming. “I haven’t said otherwise.”
Suddenly standing up, Tryne said, “I have chores to get to, and I insist that you escort me back.”
“Why?” Jerek asked, pushing himself up as well.
“Because that’s what gentlemen do for ladies.” Linking her arm with Jerek’s, Tryne began to pull him off. “Come on, we have lots of work to do. It’s just the two of us running this farm, after all.”
“You told me that I wouldn’t have to do any farmwork.”
“I’d still appreciate it if you helped me out a little. It won’t be that bad.”
Jerek sighed and rolled his eyes. “I don’t have a choice in this, do I.”
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Children’s books
I have a confession to make.
I don’t read books to my kids.
Which is kind of funny, because I have always loved books. I wrote and illustrated my first when I was just in kindergarten, and kept the practice up for my entire life.
We started out normal enough when my oldest was a baby. We got a few children’s stories, and I read them enough that I could recite them from beginning to end without any prompts; my daughter’s absolute favorite book was simply titled Water Animals and consisted of pictures and names of things like dolphins, fish, and a polar bear for good measure.
That all changed when baby #2 came along.
My oldest started tearing apart books. Water Animals was shredded to pieces, so I taped it together as best I could then tucked it away somewhere safe (it will probably be years before we find it again). After giving her some time to adjust to having a younger sibling, we bought more books and to my dismay those were also torn up. Several months later, I mentioned to a neighbor that we didn’t have any children’s books, and she gave us a few that also met the same fate.
I was tired of cleaning up the mess, so I gave up. No more.
These days the children and I snuggle up with our Nintendo 3DS and read video game dialogue together.
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Fade to White chapter 9
Fade to White
Chapter Nine
Tiptoeing through his lounge, Jerek was careful not to wake up Ramo who was still sleeping on the couch. Despite the late night before, he had gotten up early on the account of not being able to sleep anyway. She was the only thing he could think about. Every time he closed his eyes he could see her sitting with her back to him, wearing a long baby pink night gown, pulling her hair out of the braid in shimmering strands of red. He could also remember waking up briefly in the dead of night and listening to her cry.
Ramo hardly ever cried, that heaven for that. Making the decision in the spur of the moment, Jerek tapped Ramo’s foot. “Get up.”
“Uh.” Rolling over, Ramo buried his face into the fabric of the couch. “Why aren’t you tired?”
“I’m a god. Get up or I’ll tell the Commander not to give you any breakfast.”
“Why would you do a thing like that?” Ramo sat up quickly.
“Because I’m a cold-hearted bastard. C’mon, let’s go eat. I haven’t had a proper meal in a couple of days.”
“All right.” Bouncing up, Ramo stretched his arms above his head and asked, “How are you this morning?”
“Progressively worse since you got up.”
Jerek smiled slightly when Ramo punched him in the shoulder, and opened the door to go out into the corridors of the castle. Faint screaming echoed down the hallway, gradually growing louder and soon a girl appeared dashing toward them, followed closely by two soldiers before one of the tackled her.
“Disgusting,” Ramo murmured behind Jerek’s shoulder. “Let’s go.”
Staying where he was, Jerek watched in amusement. That girl looked familiar.
“Help me!” the girl suddenly cried out, lunging at Jerek. “Please save me! I don’t care what you do to me, so long as it’s not him!”
It was the teenager from Opal. He remembered her now. “Go on and leave,” he told the soldiers who stood and looked at each other with uncertainty before obeying. “Tell me.” Jerek crouched down to look at her in the face better as he addressed the girl. “Were you thinking that I would make use of you? Is that why you struck that deal? You’re a shallow little girl.”
“Save me,” the girl sobbed, reaching up and clinging to the front of his shirt. “I know you have a good heart. Otherwise, you would have never helped the children.”
“The children are dead.” Jerek pried the girl’s fingers from his shirt, then holding both of her wrists with one hand, reached to his leg where he kept a hidden knife. “As you deserve to be.”
The girl began screaming again, repeating the word “no” over and over, struggling against Jerek’s hold on her and trying to escape. Bringing the knife up, Jerek hesitated. She was crying.
“Not right before breakfast,” Jerek grunted, standing up. “I don’t want you ruining my meal.”
“Jerek! Make her stop!” Ramo suddenly burst out, his hands pressed against his ears, droplets sparkling at the corners of his eyes.
“Ramo, it’s okay.” Turning to Ramo, Jerek grabbed his wrists and forced his hands down.
“No Jerek! Make her stop! I can’t stand it! Make her stop!” Tears were flowing freely down Ramo’s cheeks as he grew closer to becoming hysterical.
“Shut the hell up!” Jerek roared, turning around and seizing the girl’s neck, lifting her up into the air. “Never scream like that, ever!” he yelled, shaking the girl forcefully. She choked and gurgled, her eyes bulging as her hands feebly hit and clawed at Jerek. “Stop that!” Thrusting his arm forward, Jerek slammed the girl against the wall, a loud smack sounding as her head made contact with the stone, then she went limp. “Are you okay Ramo?”
Ramo nodded. “I’m sorry. It’s just . . .”
“I know. How did the girl escape anyway? She shouldn’t have been in this part of the castle to begin with.”
“Did you just kill my whore, Jerek?”
Dropping the girl, Jerek dusted his hands. “Commander and King, you’re becoming lax in your security.”
“Perhaps.” Kneeling down, Nosaj put his hand on the girl’s neck, then with a disgusted look he straightened and kicked the girl’s body. “I expect you to replace her. Someone young and fresh like she was.”
“I’ll think about it after breakfast.” Jerek turned around, but Nosaj stopped him with a hand on his shoulder.
“Ramo, go on ahead. Jerek and I are going to take a little walk, then meet up with you later.”
“Okay.” Ramo was barely audible. “I’m sorry.”
“You aren’t that upset over losing one girl, are you?” Jerek shifted around, obviously impatient.
“No, no, this isn’t about that. Perhaps you’ve already heard, but it has recently come to my attention that there’s also a rebel group in the Amber Village. You know I like to have peace in my Twelve Villages, but currently we’re down to eleven, and I don’t want to be forced to destroy another one.” Tapping a bony finger against his lips, Nosaj asked, “What do you suppose I should do?”
Jerek shrugged, giving no other reply.
“Tch, Jerek.” Nosaj shook his head. “That’s disappointing of you. Sometimes I wonder if you’ll make a good heir, or if everything will just fall apart in your hands.”
“That depends on the strength of the kingdom my predecessor builds. If he hands me a weak kingdom, then time will take its course, regardless.”
“At least you’re quick witted in some areas. Now here’s what we’re going to do: we have one city that needs to be rebuilt, and another that needs to be divided. Do you see?”
“A relocation? Won’t that just put the rebels in both towns?”
“Their forces will be divided and communication with their leader will be cut off. We’ll also saturate both of the cities with soldiers so it will be difficult for them to reorganize, and it would take some very determined people to keep that silly little group alive.”
“What if they are that determined?”
Nosaj chuckled. “Then I’ll give them my kudos.”
“And you want me to take care of this for you?”
“I’m getting older, Jerek. I have you. I don’t need to go out on raids anymore. Why else do you think I saved you and raised you as my own?” Smiling, Nosaj reached up and patted Jerek’s face. “Go and join Ramo now, that boy’s waiting for you.”
“Oh goodie,” Jerek grunted.
“And Jerek,” Nosaj suddenly turned back around to face him again. “There was a woman brought in here the other day, claiming to be the leader of the rebels. I was really quite surprised to see her, especially under those circumstances, considering that for quite some time she had been paying me to turn a blind eye on her godforsaken farm. I’ll have a map of its location sent to you, and I want that farm destroyed. I’m beginning to think that maybe the house had been a meeting place for miscreants.” Starting to laugh, Nosaj added, “And all this time I thought it was a brothel!”
Turning around, Jerek walked off without a word in reply. He couldn’t decide which made him angrier, the fact that Nosaj didn’t tell him about the cottage until now, or that he had actually been talking about Tryne’s farm. He doubted that Tryne knew that her mother had been paying off Nosaj, because it was something that she would never accept. It had been hard fighting the urge to reach out to forcefully remove that smile from Nosaj’s face. It was insulting that Nosaj kept information from him, and as the future heir to the title of Commander and King, he deserved to know all of Nosaj’s business. He needed that trust, so that when he did take over he would be able to hold the Twelve Villages together.
Bursting into the dining room, Jerek caught Ramo by surprise and caused him to jump. Jerek huffed slightly as he looked at the place set for him, the plate piled high with scrambled eggs and warm fruit croissants. Taking a seat, Jerek used his fork to viciously stab a sausage.
“What did Nosaj want to talk about?” Ramo asked, leaning casually against his hand but looking at Jerek intently.
“Strategy,” Jerek replied, then quietly whispered, “And to flaunt in my face how much he keeps from me.”
“Oh.” Putting his fork into his mouth, Ramo paused thoughtfully. “So what are our future moves?”
“Massive relocation, from Amber to Opal. Half the city’s population with as few fatalities as possible, but we have to keep up the scare factor.”
“How are you planning on moving all those people?”
“Soldiers surrounding everyone with guns and swords. They’ll have no choice but to walk.”
“You can do it, no problem.” Ramo smiled, swirling his fork through the air before scooping up more eggs with it. “This morning’s breakfast is really good.”
“Yeah, it is.” After pausing for a moment, Jerek said, “I want to train.”
“Ooo Jerek, can I fight with you? It’s been forever since we’ve done that.” Excited, Ramo leaned forward.
“That’s because I’m way better than you. I’d break you.”
“Then you can fix me. Please?”
Standing up, Jerek turned to the door. “Better hurry then,” he said, looking sideways at Ramo. Jumping up, Ramo skipped as he followed Jerek to his personal training room. The walls were lined with swords, though most of them were nothing more than sparkly decorations. Turning, Jerek retrieved two wooden swords from the corner where they had been standing propped up. Tossing one of the practice swords to Ramo, Jerek then took off his shirt and dropped it to the floor where it landed lightly in a white pile. Flexing his muscles, Jerek picked up the second sword and looking over his shoulder at Ramo said, “I won’t go easy on you.”
Then he paused as the black mark on the back of his shoulder caught his eye. He was always thrown off by that tattoo, because he could never seem to remember that he had it, despite the fact that the ink in his skin was years old. It was Nosaj’s symbol, a snake twisted around a black rose that bore venomously sharp thorns. Ramo took off his shirt too, revealing a similar mark on the back of his shoulder, and picked up a sword, pointing it at Jerek and saying “En garde.”
Jerek chuckled, standing ready for Ramo’s attack. “I hope you don’t try any fencing moves. These are the wrong weapons for that.”
“I won’t,” Ramo said as he took a swing at Jerek, who brought up his wooden blade and blocked the blow, then thrust Ramo’s sword to the side and in almost the same movement struck Ramo’s leg.
“Ow!”
“Hurt already?”
“Well, you hit me rather hard,” Ramo said as he gingerly touched where his leg had been hit. “It’ll probably bruise.”
“Go on and sit down, I’ll just do some exercises.” Turning his back to Ramo, Jerek continued to swing his sword at the air. Ramo nodded and limped over to the wall, sitting on the ground with his back leaning against it.
“You’ve gotten a lot better.”
“I told you so.” There was a moment of silence before Jerek plunged into words. “So what does it mean when you can’t stop thinking about someone?” he asked, trying hard to sound casual.
“It depends, what kind of feelings do you have when you think of them?” Ramo’s back arched as he leaned forward with piqued curiosity.
“I don’t know. Kind of happy, kind of annoyed, I guess. I think I want to spend more time with this person.”
“Jerek, are you in love?”
“No!” Jerek brought his sword swinging down so quickly it made a hissing noise in the air. Sullenly, he added, “I’m just intrigued, that’s all.”
Ramo laughed, sounding relieved. “So such emotion has yet to happen to the great and wonderful Jerek, but who knows, maybe that’ll change sometime in the future.”
“Don’t look at me like that.” Jerek hunched his shoulders, keeping his back to Ramo. “And don’t talk like that.”
The door swung open, revealing Nosaj who looked at them for a second before cracking a grin. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt you.”
Jerek put down his sword and picked up his shirt, then pulling it on he walked up to Nosaj and said loudly, “We were finished anyway,” then continued past Nosaj.
“I meant to tell you, Jerek. I want the relocation done today.”
Jerek stopped. “Today?”
“Yes, if you would.”
“I don’t feel up to it today. I had a late night.”
Nosaj seemed to be a little surprised. “Very well then, tomorrow. We have to get this done quickly, you know.”
Nodding, Jerek pushed his way through the door into his sitting room and from there into his bedroom, locking the door behind him. Getting down on his hands and knees, he pulled out his secret stash of cigarets and lit one, but failing to receive any sort of enjoyment, he tossed it out the window. What he was craving was Tryne’s simple and wholesome cooking. What he wanted was to see Tryne again. He wasn’t in love, he couldn’t be, and yet he felt something in his chest . . . Maybe he was. The thought made him smile.
Thank you for sharing my work!
Fade to White chapter 8
Fade to White
Chapter Eight
Footsteps echoed hollowly as Jerek strode quickly through the dark and empty hallway, barely stopping to throw open the large double doors that led into the lounge room of his chambers. He blinked at the light. Lying on the sofa near the large fireplace was Ramo, his eyes closed and his hand resting on a book lying open near his face. Jerek started to tiptoe across the rug to get to his bedroom door on the other side, but Ramo stirred and opened his eyes.
“Jerek!” He sounded relived. “Where were you?”
Stopping, Jerek watched Ramo sit up. “Is that a girl’s shirt?”
“Huh?” Ramo looked down at his chest at the frilly button up he was wearing, then laughed slightly. “I thought it looked good on me. Why didn’t you come home last night?”
“Maybe I wasn’t in the mood to see a man cross dressing. Why would you degrade yourself like that?”
Rolling his eyes, Ramo said, “Just go ahead and say that you think I’m sexy. You don’t have to be so guarded all the time.”
“I could give you one of my shirts to wear until you have a chance to change.”
“At least you aren’t hitting me this time.” Laying down on his back, Ramo crossed his arms over his chest.
“Oh.” Jerek shook his head and pulled his fingers through his hair. “I’m sorry about that.”
“I was worried about you. After that raid you went on the other day, you were so ornery, then you disappeared.”
Sitting down in one of the cushioned chairs, Jerek asked, “Does the Commander know?”
“No, I covered for you. I almost thought I wouldn’t have to, but today at lunch he mentioned you. Jerek, where were you?”
“That village northeast of here, Amber.”
“No way, you’re kidding! Don’t you know what happened there the other day?”
“What?”
Ramo grinned, leaning forward toward Jerek and talking in a private voice, “A couple of our soldiers went there after you raided Opal, and guess what they uncovered? The rebel group, they’re in that town too! This woman started freaking out at them, calling herself the leader of the Resistance and spouting off how the Commander was going to fall, so the soldiers brought her here . . .”
“Alive?”
“Of course. How else could the Commander question her? I caught a glimpse of the woman before Nosaj shut me out, and she was really plain. She looked like the product of poverty: worn out and depressed. She was disgusting.” Ramo paused. “I can’t believe you didn’t hear about this. Did anyone recognize you?”
“They barely know I exist.” Jerek smirked, sitting back and crossing his ankle over his leg. “Of course no one’s going to recognize me.”
“I thought that after Opal, news of you would’ve spread like a wildfire. They still don’t know anything?”
“Ramo, don’t forget who I am.” Standing up, Jerek motioned like he was drawing out an invisible sword. “No one survived to tell any rumors about me.” Suddenly turning around, Jerek thrust his imaginary weapon into Ramo’s stomach. “I’m just that good.”
Laughing, Ramo said, “That’s what I love about you.” Stopping, Jerek stared at him then quickly sat down, an awkward silence sneaking in. “I’m sorry,” Ramo whispered. “I know you’ve told me about that, but it just slipped out.”
“I was wrong, that shirt fits you.” Jerek got back up to his feet and walked to the door of his bedroom.
“Jerek, please.”
Still facing the door, Jerek began speaking, “Do you know why we take the dead bodies of our enemies with us?”
“Sort of. They can’t have funerals, and sometimes they don’t know about the death for a long time.” Ramo shrugged. “So I guess we do it to break down rebellious spirits.”
“Legend has it that when a body is burned, the spirit burns with it and is destroyed, and that’s why we collect the corpses. Call it superstition on the Commander’s part, but by cremating his enemies he’s insuring that no one receives any supernatural help. It’s also why we burn all the buildings in a raid.”
“Why are we talking about this?”
“Future reference, I suppose. As future Second in Command, you ought to know these kinds of things, and it’s time for you to stop playing and start doing a real job.”
“Jerek! You mean it?” Bounding up, Ramo ran to Jerek, catching him in a hug as he turned around. “Thank you so much! You’ve made me so happy!” Forgetting himself, Ramo planted a quick kiss on Jerek’s mouth.
“Ramo,” Jerek’s voice was constrained. “Let go of me, and don’t ever do that again.” He wiped his lips with the back of his hand. “That’s the most disgusting thing ever.”
“Oh Jerek, get over it! Quit being so tough all the time, it’s okay to show a little tenderness every now and then.” Ramo rolled his eyes. “Are you going to bed now?”
“You can’t come, if that’s what you’re getting at.”
“No, I was just asking.”
“I’m locking my door too,” Jerek said as he went into his bedroom, slamming the door shut behind him.
Rubbing his lips again, Jerek walked across the room. The worst part about being kissed was that the feeling remained long after the action was done. It was disgusting, and he didn’t understand why people would ever want to do it. He didn’t understand why he put up with Ramo’s little quirks all the time, no matter how often Ramo managed to repulse him. He didn’t understand why she was there in the back of his mind, pushing to come forward and whispering thoughts to him. He wanted her out. He had already gotten more information out of her than he had ever wanted, and he had no intention of ever going back.
Ken had lied to her about what happened to her mother. He should have told her the truth.
Jerek sat down on the bed and pulled out a cigaret, but after staring at it for a few minutes, he couldn’t bring himself to light it. Putting it away, Jerek kicked off his boots and lied down on his back, staring at the ceiling. Surely she’s noticed his absence by now, and he wondered if she would search for him.
“Jerek,” Ramo’s muffled voice came through the wooden door.
“What is it?” Jerek growled.
“The torches in the corridor have been put out.”
“All right, go ahead and sleep on the couch.” Jerek could already feel his strength leaking out of his body and going into the mattress; he didn’t want to be bothered to walk Ramo to his room.
“Not with you?” Ramo called, then as if he could see Jerek’s face, added, “Just kidding!”
“I ought to kill him,” Jerek grumbled to himself, but then a thought crossed his mind. “Ramo?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you ever want to leave the castle?”
There was a pause before Ramo answered, “Not really. This is the only place I’m accepted, where I can be who I am with no fear. Why do you ask?”
“I don’t know. I guess because it gets a little lonely around here.”
“You aren’t alone, not with me around. We’re best friends.”
“I’m going to have nightmares now. Thank you and goodnight.”
Thank you for sharing my work!
Dance to Forget
We are madly in love with this song in my house right now.
Thank you for sharing my work!
Maturity
As I’ve been reading the Fade to White chapters that I’ve been posting, I can’t help but find it jarringly jumpy — like most of what was in my head when I wrote it never actually made it into words. I want to go back and smack my 19-year-old self then tell her to stop reading so much manga.
Maybe at some point in the future I’ll rewrite it, because the story itself is cute. Or maybe I’ll be too engrossed in other projects to care.
Thank god I’m not 19 anymore.
By Autumn Rain 