Category: About Writing

About Writing

Nauseous vs Nauseated

Autumn

The other day out of desperation, I ate Real Food for lunch, then promptly had to make a run for the toilet. Lawlz.

Fortunately that seems to have been the worst of my morning sickness (knock on wood). Yesterday I managed to eat an ENTIRE baked potato. Oh sure, it was a small one, but I still ate the WHOLE THING. Victory!

My official opinion at this point is that it is way harder to be pregnant in my 30s than it was in my 20s.

So

Something that has irritated me for years and years now is that everyone misuses the word ‘nauseous.’ I mean EVERYONE.

When something is nauseous, it makes people want to throw up. For example, “The nauseous smell of rotten fish permeated the air and caused everyone to turn green.”

If you are nauseous, that means that you make everyone around you want to vomit. Maybe you haven’t practiced any sort of hygiene for a year. Maybe your personality is just that bad.

Nauseated is when you want to throw up yourself, probably because you’re trapped in a small room with the nauseous person and have no escape.

Understand?

Because every single last one of you is misusing ‘nauseous’ when you’re supposed to be saying ‘nauseated.’ It’s not your fault, because the misuse is so ubiquitous that you have no clue that it’s technically wrong.

NAUSEATED.

Not nauseous.

NAUSEATED.

Consider yourselves schooled.

About Writing

Fatigue

Autumn

Ages ago, we had a neighbor who was expecting her second at the same time I was pregnant with #3. She and I used to visit a fair bit back then, and she spent months talking about how great she felt, while I was more candid about how I spent all day lying on the couch watching my older children smash Cheetos on the floor, because meh. Her baby was born about three weeks before mine.

A year later, shortly before our conversations stopped completely, she confessed that she had experienced crushing fatigue during her pregnancy.

Well, duh. There’s a giant parasite burrowing into your bloodstream and stealing all your nutrients. Fatigue is going to be part of the process, especially during the first trimester when that whole placenta thingy is growing and establishing itself — you’re not just making a baby, you know. It doesn’t make you a weak and pathetic person to feel tired. It means you’re human, like everyone else.

I still wonder why she felt compelled to pretend otherwise.

So, here I am, pregnant with #5, and I’m tired. No, it doesn’t get easier the more times you go through it, and yes, it does freak me out a little to say “I’m expecting my fifth” — that’s starting to feel like a lot of kids. I get dizzy if I stand up too quickly, and I feel just awful in the evenings. I also love my new baby very much, and everyone is super excited.

Thankfully, my first two are now old enough that they vacuum the floor, instead of smashing snacks all over it.

About Writing

Inuyashiki

Autumn

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I used to be a big anime geek when I was a teenager, and watched far more series than I care to admit to. I grew out of it after a few years, mainly because I got burnt out on most of the stereotypes and tropes — anime just got so anime, if you know what I mean.

I still watch it every now and then when the mood strikes, which is how I came across Inuyashiki Last Hero.

This is definitely a “after the kids have gone to bed” sort of show.

The basic plot is that 58-year-old Inuyashiki and high school student Shishigami are accidentally killed by inter-dimensional aliens, who replace their bodies with highly advanced combat robots to cover up their crime. Hilarity ensues.

I’m bringing this up because of the characterization of Shishigami was particularly noteworthy. He’s the main antagonist of the story, and the audience sees him do some pretty evil stuff. There’s no doubt that he’s a sociopath who is incapable of empathizing with strangers.

However, he’s not *all* bad. When he cares about someone, he deeply cares about them. More than once, he tries to quit doing evil for the sake of his loved ones, then gets pushed back into it when his loved ones get unfairly hurt.

It creates a genuine conflict in the audience. On one hand, you want to hate him because you see him do really terrible things; on the other, you can’t help but feel that some of his acts were justified. Not all, mind you, but definitely some. He would have settled down into helping society instead of hurting it, if society had been capable of leaving him alone — the audience knows this, and can’t help but feel bad for him because he’s demonized so thoroughly that he can’t change despite his best efforts.

The anime turned out to be a thought-provoking departure from the usual stereotype of the evil antagonist.

So the next time you sit down to start writing a novel, don’t be afraid to humanize your villain. It’ll be a change of pace from what everyone is used to.

About Writing

Terrible Reader

Autumn

I confess that I’m a terrible reader. Every time I pick up a book, I think, “This time I’ll read every word,” then sooner or later, I get bored and start skipping through.

“Why is the author taking so long to call the wagon green?”

“Meh, sex.”

“Okay, this character is stupid.”

“We get it already, they had a good time at the picnic.”

When I read out loud to the children, I adopt that bored, “Let’s get through this massive paragraph as quick as possible” monotone voice, and I’m afraid it’s pretty obvious that I don’t enjoy it.

It always feels like there’s a huge number of words getting in the way of the story, and I can’t remember the last time I found a book engrossing. Sometimes I could swear that authors actually want readers to skim over half of the novel, and throw in lots of filler just to look more impressive at first glance.

“In my book, it takes 800 pages for fifteen characters to make a single grilled cheese sandwich. It’s rich with subplots about running out of bread, taking bathroom breaks, and even falling in love. I also included numerous philosophical discussions about the merits of cheddar versus colby jack, and the different methods of toasting the bread. I included lots of poetry. There’s even a surprise plot twist where it turns out that half the characters are actually grilled cheese sandwiches themselves! The novel ends after the characters burn down the house and die because they tried to make it in the toaster.”

Oh wow!

No way!

The funny thing is, when I read my own stories with the same method I use to read other novels, I do get the whole, “WOAH this story is progressing crazy fast!” feeling. My style really isn’t best experienced by charging through. I do always “test read” my stuff before putting it out there, and following the natural flow of my mind without trying to speed up or edit anything feels good to me, so that’s how I keep it.

I skip writing the stuff that I skip reading. Which is a lot. But hey, that also means that there isn’t anything for you to skip over either, because I’m probably WAY worse than you about that.

Lol.

About Writing

Writing Lessons from Bob Ross: Embrace the Process

Autumn

Sometimes I like to turn on Bob Ross to absorb how calm and mellow he is, and I find it relaxing to sit and watch him paint for a bit. Children are highly chaotic entities, so I know how to appreciate the change in pace that comes with everyone sitting together watching a show that we can all enjoy.

It occurred to me that one could also learn how to write from Bob Ross, as long as you think metaphorically.

He doesn’t simply slap down blobs of color and call it done. He blends the paint, adds shadows and highlights, and is mindful of the details. He also doesn’t overwork the paint or try to control every single aspect of the picture, instead working with the textures of the brush strokes and allowing elements to evolve naturally.

And, as everyone knows, “There are no mistakes, only happy accidents.”

A lot of writers stop at the blobs of color phase. They’ll free write whatever passes through their minds then hit ‘publish’ without any more thought about the story. These sorts of writers can produce a lot of content in a short amount of time, but it will all feel unpolished and unsatisfying. Often, when I have tried to explain how these writers have good potential but they need to dedicate more attention to reworking their story, they get upset rather than accepting the advice (even when I’m responding to their request for criticism). So, remember, blobs of color are your foundation, but they are not your finished story. The first draft should not be your last. And no, your blobs of color are not more genius than anyone else’s. They all pretty much look the same.

Others will overwork the story to death. They’ll edit out the spontaneity of adventure, and reduce their characters to props who serve rigid roles, instead of letting them shine as quirky individuals. These writers don’t let the overall picture evolve naturally, and their stories feel formulaic. While they are often well intentioned, they don’t know how to let the story flow on its own.

There are also writers who put in too much detail, and create overly-busy stories with no clear focus. They forget to leave the background in the background. They throw too much information at the reader all at one, or create more characters than there’s room for. They describe the condiments instead of the picnic.

When you are in the process of editing, take a step back and try to visualize the story as a painting. Is there enough detail without being overdone? Did you let elements evolve naturally and follow the flow? Did you flesh out the foreground and leave the background appropriately hazy? Is it something that you would hang on *your* wall? Remember, you can always fix it.

And the next time you watch Bob Ross, just imagine that he’s speaking in metaphor and soak in all of his encouragement.

About Writing

Embrace Your Creative Freedom in Fiction Writing

Autumn

I often think that the problem with contemporary fiction writing is that there are too many rules to contend with. Writing communities are stiff with them. People constantly ask for help with them and enforce them on others. Most of the time, whenever someone asks for a critique, it boils down to, “Am I following the rules properly?”

What about creative passion? Idealism? Soul expression? Where do those fit in?

Why do people ask, “Is this something that others would read?” instead of, “Is this something I care deeply about?”

When it comes to writing, the single most important thing is to have fun. Enjoy it. Randomly burst into laughter because you thought of something funny to write while waiting in line at the grocery store. Cry when your characters are sad. Ride the roller coaster of emotion that comes from being a writer, and revel in the intensity of life. It can be so blissfully wonderful.

Tell as much as you want instead of showing it. Use the word ‘said’ exclusively. Describe everything with adverbs. Neglect world building. Write only subplots. Use your favorite cliches. Include funky colloquialisms.

Just be you.

Don’t copy someone else. Don’t seek out everyone else’s approval. Don’t slavishly follow rules and formulas because someone wrote an article about it. Don’t follow bad advice from the internet.

Figure out what you like, and do it. Perfect it. Develop a strong voice and your own unique style.

I believe that there’s an empathic transfer that happens between author and reader. If you aren’t madly head over heels in love with your own story to begin with, then no one else will feel that way either. If you don’t care, then no one else will care.

And besides,

You can’t please everyone.

But you can certainly please yourself. So isn’t that where you ought to start?

(And yes, I know I’ve written a similar post before, but exposure to writing communities always puts me on this train of thought)

About Writing

Word Count

Autumn

Sometimes I angst about word count.

The way I see it, most people take forever to say absolutely nothing, so a novel with 90,000 words is going to be mostly rambling — it really shouldn’t take 1,000 words to say something that can be expressed in 10, but people do it anyway. I don’t read epic novels because of this.

I’m naturally a straightforward and concise person, so how people manage to put out so much filler leaves me baffled. How on earth do they manage to avoid getting to the point for so long?

However, reading is like listening to music, in the sense that it possesses a rhythm and flow. Sometimes I worry that my blunt phrasing leaves others feeling that the experience was too short for their liking. Yes, I made my point and told the story, but maybe I should have lingered on a few particular scenes purely for the sake of making them longer and more satisfying.

Like sex, for the analogy. Sometimes you want to play around and draw things out, instead of just getting right to the orgasms. Of course, sometimes its been a long day and while you want sex, you also want to get off quickly so you can fall asleep wrapped in post-coital bliss. Too long, and you start to go numb.

Though, I did read that intercourse lasts for only 6 minutes on average, so maybe that’s a bad comparison. I’m also deliberately trying to ramble, to see how it feels. It’s chaotic. Can’t say I enjoy it.

Maybe I should make my characters stupid, so they get into more trouble and generate more drama. And side plots. Hilarity ensues, and all that jazz. To help the readers feel like they’re hanging out more.

Or sex scenes. Because sex, lol.

I dunno.

I don’t want to be the sort of person who churns out epic novels, but I worry that I tend to under do it. I hope the fact that I’m focusing on e-books for cheap/free helps compensate for my blunt personality, though maybe it doesn’t matter as much as I fear.

I’m still not at 400 words. Good god, how do people do it? I made my point ages ago, came up with a titillating analogy, and now all I’ve got to go on is repetition.

Repetition.

Pointed repetition.

Reeeepeeetiiitiooooon.

Meh, I’ll never get there.

 

About Writing

World Building

Autumn

Writing communities always make me feel like I’m the crazy, avant-garde person that everyone dismisses because I’m just so out there.

Crazy is a given. But avant-garde? I don’t think so. I always thought I was more old-fashioned in my approach.

There’s a hyper-focus on world building, world building, world building(!!!1) with fantasy and sci-fi. This is obviously inspired by everyone fantasizing that they are writing the next Lord of the Rings.

Me? I thought Lord of the Rings was okay. Not inspiring, but not a waste of time. Certainly not something I want to emulate. Definitely not something I want to endlessly reread with different clothing.

The problem with novels based on world building is that they are dry. The plot is painfully generic, and the characters are one-dimensional props that bounce from explanation to explanation; about how dragons are blah blah blah, and the king’s daughter is blah blah blah, and magic is blah blah blah. Maybe the main character is given an interesting ability, but then their personality is so stereotypical that no one can be bothered to actually care. Insert weird names like fah’ri and el’wes in a effort to make it more unique, but not really…

I confess that I quit reading high fantasy when I was in middle school. Never could develop the stomach for it.

My style is character-driven storytelling. Instead of drawing maps, I read books on psychology. I think about readability and flow. The plot is a natural extension of the characters, driven by their goals and personalities. I build just enough world to give the story a solid foundation, but I don’t think about it excessively. I don’t come up with enough material for a compendium by any stretch of the imagination.

So, while the topic of writing is something that I have put a great deal of time and consideration into, my fundamental approach is different from everyone else in my chosen genres. I’m crazy and different, and no one seems to know how to respond to me. Ha ha.

Maybe I’m even avant-garde.

About Me, About Writing

Finding Beauty in the Ordinary: A Writer’s Journey

Autumn

I’ve always believed that a talented enough writer could turn the topic of drying paint into a fascinating read, but there’s something that I didn’t quite realize until my late 20s:

You have to be the sort of person that sees the beauty in drying paint in the first place.

This is on the “no duh” side of epiphanies, but frankly, it’s not how I was taught to live.

I was raised on the “go to college, get married, spend the rest of your life balancing work and family” formula. Occasionally someone would advise to stop and smell the roses, but you weren’t supposed to notice the veins of color in the petals, or compose metaphors to describe the scent. You definitely weren’t supposed to study the thorns in great detail either.

Did I lose you? Do you understand?

I rebelled when I was 20. I don’t mean that I went to wild parties or did anything stupid; I’ve always been far too introverted for rambunctious crowds, and too conscientious for short-sighted acts. I went to the park late at night to play on the swing set and feel the cool summer air play through my hair. I danced in rainstorms. I fell madly in love with the simple things, like listening to crickets or watching a candle flame dance. I engaged.

And no one understood. How could they? I was surrounded by people who spent their entire lives dissociated from their experiences, and they just didn’t know what to do with me. I was labeled ‘weird’ and left at that.

Being a talented writer isn’t just knowing the mechanical skills, it’s an entire way of living. It’s being unafraid to see the world like no one else does. It’s embracing both the pleasure and the pain. When you, as a person, live a life of passion, it will automatically permeate your writing.

That’s one of the reasons why I feel so driven to write: I want to share how I experience life in a way that others will understand. I want to offer more than what can be seen on the surface.

Metaphorically speaking, I want to express the beauty I see in drying paint.

About Writing

Writing for readers

Autumn

At some point during the writing process, you have to start thinking about your readers.

I don’t mean you should sellout and introduce a teenage vampire who spends all day angsting about how much he hates himself, and all night getting spanked in the local underground BDSM scene, before being chosen to participate in a deadly game of wits and survival. Yuck. No.

When you chat with someone face-to-face, it’s considered polite to speak clearly and audibly, and to continually read the other person’s cues to make sure they aren’t growing bored by your rambling. When you’re done, you say goodbye instead of just walking away.

Writing should be approached with the same considerations. While it’s much harder to work without a present audience yawning and glancing at their cell phones, it’s good to empathize with imaginary readers and place yourself in their shoes, so to speak.

Continually ask yourself questions like:

“Is this sentence clear or do I need to reword it?”

“Is this part boring?”

“Are my transitions smooth or jarring?”

“Does this paragraph flow when I read it out loud, or is it choppy?”

“Is the end too abrupt?”

Etc, etc, etc.

Your readers are your best friends; they’re the ones who appreciate a part of you that even your parents don’t know about (at least for many of us writers, lol). Don’t take them for granted. Be a gracious host and make sure that they’re having a good time.

If you know someone you trust who fits your target audience, go ahead and use them as a beta reader. Watch them read. Pay attention to their facial expressions and body language. While they may say that something is good, a wrinkled brow and down turned mouth will tell you that there was something unsatisfying, but they might not be able to articulate it. Don’t take it personally, just think about how to make it better. I promise you that it’s a good feeling to come back with the improved version and watch someone gush over something they were previously “meh” about.

While it’s good practice to write the first draft for yourself, be in the habit of rewriting the last one for your readers. They have the power to set you down and dismiss you forever, so don’t lord your ego over them. Be nice and considerate, and show some appreciation.