A/N: …I wanted a break from serious writing...
Hartmann paced around the empty room, occasionally flipping a coin and studying it, before continuing on his circuit. Lambert, on the other hand, sat still in the middle of the floor, staring up at the ceiling.
“Do you …” he began, then hesitated.
“Get sick of all these tails?” Hartmann suggested. “Can’t say I do.”
Lambert gave him a flat look. “I thought you were getting heads.”
“Not from you,” Hartmann muttered in reply.
“What I meant to say was that it seems like we’re stuck in a featureless void.”
“Looks more like a room to me.”
“Do you see any doors or windows?”
“No. But there are distinct planes and vertices.”
Lambert rolled his eyes. “Alright then, a featureless cube.”
“Clearly, the answer is that when we were told we were going to be integrated into a biomechanical alien species, we were lied to. Either this room is some sort of alien prison, or we’re dead,” Hartmann replied.
“Yes. That makes sense,” Lambert mused. “But why do you have that coin?”
“It was in my pocket.”
“And why does it only ever come up heads?”
“Alien space magic. Why else?” Hartmann answered.
“Do you ever think that you and I are ultimately interchangeable?”
“We’re the variables. You represent the noble side of humanity, while I’m the cavalier aspect. Lawful good versus chaotic neutral.”
“You wanted to talk about it,” Hartmann muttered.
“Sometimes we might as well be the same person,” Hambert said darkly.
“There could be some truth to that,” Lartmann replied. “Our identities are already intermixing.
“I liked who I was,” Harbert said sulkily.
“How do you think I feel? You are a comparatively boring person,” Lamtmann pouted.
“Damn alien technology,” Hartert grumbled.
“Tell me about it,” Lambmann agreed.
“Fading …” Hartmet gasped.
“No …” Lambeann sobbed.
And together, they merged into Lartbertmann – half man, half another man.