Life doesn’t run a clear course It flows through from within It’s supposed to take you places and leave markings on your skin
And those marks are just a sign of something true you witnessed in your time Of something new, like the start of something fine
As a society, we tend to think of every moment spent on a failed venture as “wasted time.” Wasted potential. Wasted life.
So I remind myself that life doesn’t run a clear course through our external achievements. Every experience, every moment lived, every thought and feeling, is what makes up our lives — it flows through from within.
Yeah, I tried my best and failed catastrophically, but I learned a lot. My internal self grew and evolved. After I’m done licking my wounds and recovering from my disasters, I can get up and try something new. Something better.
So, according to my “most used” menu, my all time favorite emoji is: ❤️
Followed by: 😂
And the next three are: 😉😘💪
Weirdly enough, this one is all the way down at number six, even though I thought I used it all the time: ☕
There. The essence of my personality in emojis. ❤️😂😉😘💪☕
I think this reflects how I share my heart and laughter with the people that I’m close to, my determination to make it through every challenge thrown at me … and my overwhelming love of coffee.
What are your favorites, and what do you think they say about you?
Back when I was 21, I wanted to get angel wings tattooed onto my back. They were meant to symbolize my spiritual connection, as well as the “angelic purity” that I always wanted to maintain within myself. I very deeply resonated with the concept of angels, and aspired to be like one. I never got this tattoo though.
Now I’m 37 and I’ve decided that I’ll probably never get a tattoo, because I’ve gotten old and squeamish, and I think that I’ve gone through more than enough pain thank-you-very-much. But, I do have markers that I use to draw Elder Futhark runes on myself with, and I like that I can change the symbolism when the ink fades.
I’ve always been passionate about words, but I have the writer’s curse of being absolutely terrible at speaking. But combining letters to create sounds and sentences? It feels like art.
Cooking
My favorite thing is to sit down to wholesome comfort food with my favorite people, which means that I’ve put in the effort to be able to prepare food that makes the moment perfect. Presentation, on the other hand, is completely different skill, and I’m not about to go adding sprigs of parsley any time soon.
Sewing
I call it my sanity hobby! I love the way the fabric feels in my fingers, and the hum of my machine as it stitches.
Child Care
While I’m not going to claim perfection, I have put in a lot of time practicing patience, and I try my best to empathize. When it comes to children, the love and care you put into them is reciprocated (though not always in obvious ways), and that means the world to me.
Moving Forward
I feel a little ridiculous for putting that one down, but after the year I’ve had, I think I ought to acknowledge how much strength it’s taken to get out of bed and keep breathing, every single day.
By Autumn Rain 